A 100000 W bulb

The darkened room with the river running through it

I woke, the bed adrift, the pillow scented

with somebody else’s perfume. Cast off

I built my own boat, found my hands

covered with paint the colour of orangeade,

striped like the ginger cat, my figurehead,

tail curled round my ankles as I dropped

anchor somewhere four hundred feet

skywards. Discovered stars in daylight, the moon

in a glass of water. Unbuilt my studio, unpainted

every picture I’d ever made. Went underground.

Lost hope. Until that desperate night when some stranger

smiled and I realised it could be for me. I could kiss

anyone I pleased. I did. Until my mouth

got tired. This time the boat was bigger, and I was afraid.

Eventually I found the horizon balanced

me and not-me. It made a grim peace.

I fell over you. I said yes. I said yes, I said

Yes, and the sun came up all night. 

Christ, writing poems with a fractious toddler hanging off your leg is not fun. No time and no energy today, though I loved the idea of a string of light bulbs. Best I could do.