Sunday, March 18, 2007

Final warning

To the heroine of my novel-in-progress.

Dear C,

What is your problem? Why do you act so sullen? I've given you not one, not two, but three hot males to choose from, and yet you stomp around looking surly and chewing a day-old piece of what was once strawberry-flavoured bubblegum, fiddling with your belly piercing and refusing to join in.

We've got a plot to develop here, girl! This is your last chance to be the heroine of a nerotic novel!

It pains me to say it, but this is your final written warning. If you don't show a bit of moxie (my favourite new word - from our Violet Blue interview over at lustbites) within the next week you are getting the chop, in favour of a light-hearted paranormal romp featuring witches.

Thin ice, girl, thin ice.

yours in puzzled desperation,



Miss Syl said...


Maybe she wants a girl instead?

Maybe she doesn't want to *choose* from the three males, but wants them in a group?

Maybe she wants to be *seduced* out of her grumpiness against her better judgment, instead of having to make the choice consciously on her own?

good luck...

Nikki Magennis said...

Hi Syl.

There's a woman there too, but that's not tempting her either!

I might try on the seduction angle. Or give her a new haircut. Something...


Lively Lad said...

...then why not bring the witch(es)in now - as obviously stuck in your filthy liddle mind at the mo? A handsome MALE witch perhaps (but PLEASE don't call him a 'warlock'- that term only exists in old Dennis Healy novels & second-rate Hammer movies (and you'll upset the real wiccan community too!)Good luck - and keep warm under yer blanket!

Lively Lad said...

oops! I can't believe I wrote 'Healy' instead of 'Wheatly'!Surprised noone's picked me up on that (but maybe the blog/comments have moved on?)

Miss Syl said...

There's a woman there too, but that's not tempting her either!

Maybe she wants a hermaphrodite? ;-)